The Trading Post
Whether you’re looking for a first pony or an Olympic mount, buying a horse can be a fraught – and often terrifying – experience. Unfortunately, selling the damn things is even worse. Ads, videos, photos and phone calls combine with the time-wasting rigmarole that goes with showing them off to create a horrific experience that only the most hardened sales people enjoy.
I’m not one of those people. And having recently seen the world from both sides, I can genuinely say that buying and selling horses is one of the equestrian world’s most torturous processes.
Here, I’ve taken a quick look at step one of selling a horse: making your ad.
Writing the ad
Once you decide to sell your eventer, you need to express this to the world. While exclaiming on Facebook how much you hate the f^#$!*% thing after you’re eliminated on the cross country might do this, obviously it’s not the most constructive way to market your steed.
This is the purpose of the ad. And whether you choose to sell your horse online, in print or through an agent, at some point you’re going to be forced to put pen to paper to describe it in a way that etiquette suggests should be as positive as possible.
Admittedly, it’s a painful process for even the most competent of writers. But since cliché rules in the world of horse advertising, feel free to cobble together your effort from the tired words of others. ‘Stunning Thoroughbred/Warmblood’ is a title that one sees more often than we should.
Thankfully, for us vendors it describes everything from the scared racehorse that bucks like a demon, to the elegant Warmblood that shies when a butterfly flaps its wings in Brazil – all while promising a potential buyer absolutely nothing.
My tip? Stick to the formula and you can’t go wrong.
The all important sign when it comes to selling your horse
Setting the price
How easy you find the process of writing the ad should play some role in setting the price. Many people determine the strength of their relationship by listing all the things they actually like about their partner, and the value of your horse can be similarly established by simply tallying up all the nice things you had to say about it in the ad.
If your ad finishes after listing the age, sex, height (and the fact that it windsucks), my best advice is to keep the price as low as possible.
Choosing the right photo is vital!
Selecting the photos
Only once you sit down to place an ad do you realise none of your photos are actually fit for public viewing.
Sure, you can find a dressage one where his eyes are rolled back in his head like a teenage boy after just finishing his first case of beer; a jumping one where a rail is caught elegantly between his legs; and a cross-country one where he seems destined to somersault into the water – but it’s unlikely that any of these masterpieces are going to sell Mr Ed for you.
Fortunately, there is a solution. While you’ve been dredging through your albums, the professional photographer has been lying in wait ready to trap you and your credit card. And since you have no other photos available, after trawling their website you’re forced to mortgage your house for a suite of shots that actually show your horse in a positive light.
All I can say is that when it comes to selling, funding the photographer’s retirement is a small price to pay.
Good luck with the buying and selling.
See you somewhere out there.
Hamish
