As one of the more “mature” amateur riders on the Victorian eventing circuit, I’ve sadly become infamous for my falls. Usually, they’re off a horse! The photo where the mud is stuck well and truly to my derriere was taken at my first pre-novice comp. I’d fallen off in the warm up, remounted and ridden clear. Would have come 5th if it wasn’t for that damn Jump 15. Still don’t know where the hell it was.
I suspect I’ve broken a few records. Barry Roycroft says my five falls in two days at one of his clinics is a record for him. Three falls in one day at Ballarat Horse Trials must be difficult to beat.....and they were off two different horses.
But my fortunes seemed to have changed lately. I now have a far better rider than me riding Gravitas, in Ross Leeson and my current thoroughbred Class Action tries really hard to help me stay on.
So why the muddy face and the menopausal muffin top? This fall can’t be blamed on the bad riding or a new addition to the Tonimbuk State Championships, the wet T-shirt competition. I’m blaming expensive sunglasses.
I was walking the Pre-novice cross country, very happy with the course to date, when I discovered the only way to get to fence 11, was to climb over fence 10. A trakehner with, as I soon discovered, a rather deep ditch that was uncharacteristically full of water due to all this rain.
I’ve recently passed (not celebrated) my 52nd birthday, and hobble along with a gammy knee awaiting replacement having already been reconstructed. So climbing the fence was to be taken slowly and with care. Perched precariously on the top rail, trying to swing my rather rotund body safely to the other side of the fence, my new $250 sunnies plopped into the ditch and promptly sank to the bottom.
I’m no Gina Rinehart when it comes to personal funds, so I was pretty keen to fish the sunglasses out. Lying on the ground, arms dangling and unable to reach the muddy bottom of the ditch, I edged myself just a little too far and, well, the photo says it all.
Once in, I was determined to find the glasses. It took a good ten minutes and I found the same stick 3 times until it occurred to me to chuck bloody thing out.
My apologies to the poor woman and her dog walking the course some time after me. She recalls seeing a pink t-shirt which she thought had been unceremoniously dumped in the ditch, only to witness it begin to move as the incredible pink hulk emerged from the ditch, victorious with sunglasses in hand.
Sadly, it wasn’t my only fall for the day. Determined to make the tight time cross country (I reckon whoever measured the course missed Jump 8 up the hill?) I was travelling too fast into the second last fence, Paddy (Class Action) clipped the top of the hay rack and pecked on landing, shooting me straight out the front with the finish line in sight. And yes, had I stuck on, we would have placed. Not the kind of consistency I was hoping for.
-This priceless piece of reporting was by Libby Price, eventer and ABC radio presenter extraordinaire
